BCmesS

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The Twitter handle for the BCS is @EveryGameCounts.  (inserting space for everyone to compose themselves after they either ralphed or laughed out loud)  If every game counts, how come only one of the five postseason games sponsored by the BCS has any bearing on who is crowned national champion?  To quote one of the greatest comedies ever:

Tommy Callahan: Let’s think about this for a sec, college football fans.  Why would somebody make their Twitter handle @EveryGameCounts when they really don’t?  Hmmmm, very interesting.

Fans:  Go on, I’m listening.

Tommy:  Here’s the way I see it guys.  BCS comes up with a fancy Twitter handle ‘cause they want you to feel all warm and toasty inside.

Fans:  Yeah, makes us feel good.

Tommy:  ‘Course it does.  Why shouldn’t it?  Ya figure you put the BCS system under your pillow at night and the ESPN fairy might come by and leave a championship, am I right, Alabama fans? 

Oh, that’s right.  I remember.  It’s because this sham isn’t about the players or the coaches or, God forbid, the fans whose economic contributions makes this entire house of cards viable.  No, this ridiculous charade we have to put up with every year is about guys with pickled index fingers that wreak of greed and impracticality while desperately grasping to hold onto their off-colored sports coats with sewn-on patches from their affiliated WhoGivesACrap.com bowl.  That’s why Division I-A football is the only level of football in the entire NCAA – and the country for that matter – that decides its champion with keyboards and algorithms instead of offenses and defenses.

(slowly stepping down from soap box)

Now, in an effort to step away from the Bristol-led misery that is the meaningless bowl season, it seemed like a fun, although fruitless, exercise to lay out what a playoff would look like if it was structured similarly to other setups throughout the NCAA.  Currently, Division I-AA (FCS?  psssh), Division II and Division III each decide their football champion with playoff systems.  The Division III setup looks very similar to March Madness; there are 32 teams that battle over five weeks to crown a champion.  Division II uses a pod approach with four different pods, individually seeded 1-6 for a total of 24 participants.  Division I-AA is in the second year of their 20-team approach where 10 conference champions earn automatic bids and 10 at-large teams are selected by a committe a la the selection committee for the Big Dance.  The top 12 seeds receive first round byes and the top four teams are matched up with the winners of the four “play-in” games from the first round.  For our fun exercise, we’re going to take a hybrid of these systems.  Each of I-A’s cousins uses a fairly large pool of teams for their playoff structure.  Although 20 wouldn’t be overkill, a 16-team playoff seems like the best number to use.  Like the D-III setup, everyone would play in the first round meaning there would be no byes for top-seeded teams.  In order to keep things even, this would necessitate doing away with the conference championship games.  And before anybody cries about the importance of a conference championship game, let’s put on the table what we all know deep-down inside – they are absolutely meaningless games created solely for bigger TV deals and ad dollars.  Plus, after one year of the new playoff system, you’ll forget about the conference championship games altogether.

Moving onto the inevitable questions from East Carolina and Virginia fans: What happens to the bowl games?  Part of me wants to say, who gives a rip?  The 2011-12 bowl season will consist of 35 bowls . . . 35!!  Of those 35 games, one, count ’em, one means anything in the scheme of determining a champion.  This system has 15 games, each one just as important as the next in deciding who takes home the crystal ball.  But, Seth, what about the teams like East Carolina and Virginia who need to go to the Liberty Bowl for their football programs to survive?  Hey, the playoff system doesn’t mean the bowls have to end.  If students, alumni and fans were willing to go to the GratuitousGame.com bowl or the Do Your Taxes With Us bowl before, why would that change now?  At least now there’s an alternative for those of us who actually like games that matter.

So, how would it work?  Well, ideally, the selection of the 16 teams would be put in the hands of three groups: a selection panel consisting of former players and coaches; the Associated Press poll; and college football fans.  Collective gasp – college football fans?!  Yea, college football fans.  This is America right?  We watch all of the games.  We read all about the teams in our cubicles at work all week.  What makes us less viable voters than the jabronies currently doing it?  Each of the three groups would account for one-third of the collective “Top 16” playoff poll.  Obviously, since a system like that is lacking, we’ll use the top 16 teams from the Week 14 BCS Rankings, prior to championship weekend.  These are the match-ups you would have seen last weekend under the new system, with game locations:

National

#1 LSU vs. #16 Michigan – Baton Rouge, LA

#8 Arkansas vs. #9 Oregon – Fayetteville, AR

#4 Stanford vs. #13 Michigan State – Palo Alto, CA

#5 Virginia Tech vs. #12 South Carolina – Blacksburg, VA

Champion

#2 Alabama vs. #15 Wisconsin – Tuscaloosa, AL

#7 Boise State vs. #10 Oklahoma – Boise, ID

#3 Oklahoma State vs. #14 Georgia – Stillwater, OK

#6 Houston vs. #11 Kansas State – Houston, TX

Submit one argument that this wouldn’t be better than what happened last weekend.  The best part?  There’s three more weekends that would be equally as awesome.  In the quarterfinals, semi-finals and the championship game, the sites would move off-campus to traditional postseason destinations.  Imagine this weekend’s quarterfinal slate with games like LSU and Arkansas at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta (site of the formerly named Peach Bowl), Stanford and South Carolina at the Fiesta Bowl in Glendale, ‘Bama and Boise State at the Orange Bowl in Miami, and Oklahoma State and K-State in the Cotton Bowl at Jerry World.  Next weekend’s semi-finals would be played at the Sugar Bowl in Nawlins and the Rose Bowl in Pasadena.  As for the championship?  This year, it’d be at The Superdome the Monday after New Year’s.  In the future, it could turn into the Super Bowl of college football, alternating venues each year and giving multiple cities the chance to host.

Close your eyes for a minute and let your brain wrap around all of the awesome possibilities in the scenario described above.  Most likely, it’ll never come close to happening.  But what’s the harm in dreaming right?  It sure beats the hell outta the AdvoCare V100 Bowl.