The Wednesday Rewind: Jamie Kuntz’s dismissal could be a banner moment for gays in sports

North Dakota State College of Sciences. Jamie Kuntz was kicked off the NDSCS football team for lying to his coach; Kuntz claims it was because he is gay.

I will not lie; in my lifetime I have told many lies – everybody has. And, depending on the severity of the lie, I have faced consequences that range from minor to major. Sometimes, it is never revealed that I talked around the truth and the consequences for such a lie are internal – the mental anguish of knowing I may have betrayed someone’s trust.

Not only have I lied in the past, I have actually lied while part of a sports team. One time at Western, I went home after a midday class and had to be back at school for a football meeting a couple hours later. I took a nap and overslept and was late heading back to campus. In order to avoid punishment, I texted my position coach and told him I had been pulled over for rolling through a stop sign, hadn’t received a ticket, and would be at the meeting shortly.

North Dakota State College of Sciences freshman Jamie Kuntz once told his football coach a lie as well. But it was telling the truth after the lie was revealed that cost the 18-year-old freshman his spot on the team.

If you follow college football with any regularity you might remember the time Dez Bryant told a lie. After a phenomenal sophomore season at Oklahoma State, when he caught 87 passes for 1,480 yards and 19 touchdowns, plus returned two punts for touchdowns, Bryant was suspended by the NCAA for the entire 2009 season because he lied to NCAA investigators.

Bryant had spent some time off the field with NFL Hall-of-Famer Deion Sanders and the NCAA was investigating the extent of the relationship. Bryant was interviewed twice and asked if he had visited Sanders’ home, worked out with Sanders and whether he had any interaction with agents while with Sanders. Although the answers to the first two questions were ‘Yes,’ Bryant told investigators ‘No.’

Ironically, the relationship with Sanders did not constitute a violation. But, Bryant didn’t know this and lied to cover his tracks. This “unethical conduct” violated NCAA Bylaw 10.1, dealing with “Knowingly furnishing the NCAA or the individual’s institution false or misleading information concerning the individual’s involvement in or knowledge of matters relevant to a possible violation of an NCAA regulation.”

Kuntz lied during Labor Day Weekend. It was a quick decision after he was questioned by his coach about an in-game, press box guest. The preparation for his lie, though, must have been building for years because Kuntz was hiding his sexuality.

For the first game of the season, Kuntz was out with a concussion but traveled with the team so he could film the game. Sometime during the third quarter of his team’s eventual 63-14 loss, a teammate saw Kuntz kissing an older man in the press box. Of course the teammate thought the best course of action was to tell the coaches.

I’m hoping this player isn’t a quarterback because his decision-making skills suck.

This image, taken from Jamie Kuntz’s Facebook page, shows his NDSCS jersey and helmet. Kuntz alleges he was dismissed from the football team because he is gay.

Just before the 15-hour bus ride home, NDSCS’s head coach Chuck Parsons confronted Kuntz about what the player had told him. Kuntz denied kissing the man and also denied being gay.

At this point in his life, as Kuntz told ABC News, only a handful of close friends knew he was gay. He said he lied because “that’s a lot to unload on somebody on a question like that. I was kind of scared I would get kicked off if I told him the right answer.”

After returning home, Kuntz decided to come clean to his coach and come out. He sent Parsons a text message telling him he was gay, that he had kissed the 65-year-old man in the booth, who was not his grandfather but instead his boyfriend, and that he was sorry for lying.

During a meeting the next day, during which Kuntz again apologized, Parson handing him a letter formally dismissing him from the team because he had lied, Kuntz said.

“He said he didn’t care what people did in their personal lives but it was a big mistake to do that on a football trip. I said, ‘yeah, I made a big mistake and I apologized again for lying.’ Then he handed me a letter and said he was kicking me off the team because what I did was ‘detrimental’ to the team and I was a ‘distraction.’”

I think it is safe to say that Kuntz was, in fact, booted from the team telling his coach a lie. School president John Richman told the AP, “[The] thought process, the facts that were reviewed, have led them to an appropriate and the right decision.” The school also released a statement saying he was dismissed because he “plainly failed to perform his duties as assigned and was an ongoing distraction to the game.”

In reality, which lie was more “distracting” and “detrimental” to the team? Lying about kissing a man in the press box or lying about being gay? While the coach and school have said the dismissale was because of the former, I’m agree with Kuntz that it was really because of the latter.

First of all, like Kuntz himself has said, why were the players even looking up in the press box during a game anyway? Second, when Kuntz comes out to his coach, one of the first times he’s told anybody other than a close friend or relative, why is the coach’s response not one of acceptance or understanding? It’s not like the dude lied about getting wasted and vandalizing property. He lied about a relationship with a man because he was not publicly gay.

I’m not sure what is less progressive about this story, the fact Kuntz was dismissed from the team for being gay; or the fact one of his teammates felt the need to tell on him for kissing a man.

The reason Kuntz lied was not necessarily because he didn’t want to get in trouble; it was because telling the truth right then and there would change his life forever. If Kuntz had already come out as gay he never would’ve had to lie in the first place. The problem is that in 2012 it is still not fully acceptable to be a gay and play competitive team sports.

If I am not mistaken, there was once a point in time when only white people were allowed to play sports. Hell, in order for women to play sports there had to be legal action to prevent sexual discrimination.

Just like in the 1950’s and 1960’s with the battle for Civil Rights, I believe we are in the midst of a similar battle for gay rights. While there is much more acceptance of the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community now then there was 20 years ago, there continues to be discrimination and feelings of uneasiness from homophobic heterosexuals.

I had a teammate once who was changing in the locker room after a workout when one of my buddies walked by his locker and mooned him. Although the guy had probably has seen his fair share of rear-ends, he completely lost his lid, went to my friends open locker and proceeded to throw all the contents on the floor while yelling something along the lines of “I’m not down with that gay shit.”

I played football with hundreds of male collegiate athletes at Western and in my four years there, odds are at least one of my teammates was gay. And yet, in a culture where it might not be acceptable to be openly gay, it’s okay to hang out in a locker room and shower with a bunch of naked dudes as long as you are straight.

When I think back to the battle for Civil Rights, breaking the color barriers in sports played a big role. When Jackie Robinson stepped onto the field for the Brooklyn Dodgers, the entire sports landscape, both at the professional and collegiate level, changed forever.

Sure, it was tough at first and Robinson dealt with a lot of racism, but he persevered and succeeded. Because of his success and his courage in the face of discrimination, he paved the way for millions of athletes who never would have had the opportunity had he not preceded them.

Jackie Robinson, left, broke the color barrier in Major League Baseball – a pivotal moment at the beginning of the Civil Rights movement. Jamie Kuntz, right (center, back), says he was dismissed from his football team because he is gay. It could be a pivotal movement in the battle for gay rights.In 20 years, we might look back on the story of Kuntz and say this was a banner moment for gays in sports. It might not necessarily carry with it the same weight as breaking the color barrier, but it’s one of the first instances I can think of where a player was publicly discriminated in a sports setting because he was gay.

“I feel like there’s so much pressure riding on me,” Kuntz said. “I feel like I’m standing up for all the gays that play sports. I’m not going to apologize for bringing [my boyfriend] up there, I’m not going to apologize for what I did.”

Moving forward, one major thing that helps people change their opinions about or toward a person or group of people is exposure. There have been countless times where I have had a teammate I initially did not like. But the more I hung around them more I realized the reason I disliked them was because I did not understand them.

Parsons had an opportunity to help his players grow as individuals and become more accepting of others. Instead, he booted Kuntz from the team and a culture of homophobia will most likely continue.

“People around here aren’t exposed to it,” Kuntz said of homosexuality. “People expect gays to be flamboyant, not football players.”

At 18-years-old, Kuntz’s journey has only just begun. My hope is that his experiences and the hardships he faces along the way will help continue the movement to establish equal rights for all people, regardless of sexuality.