You want to know a fun fact about Texas Longhorns football? It hasn’t won a national title since before I was in elementary school. You want to know another one? Head Coach Steve Sarkisian has done absolutely nothing to end that drought.
Normally, one would think he’d be trying his hardest to change that, yet he isn’t. Instead, he’s still whining about how the Horns have too hard of a schedule, and how the CFP is allegedly neglecting that, and why? Because of three damning regular-season losses, but who cares about those? With that said, let’s pick on Texas Tech for its “weak” schedule just because!
That’s what brings us to now, where the Red Raiders have challenged Texas to a Week 1 matchup for this upcoming season. Will that take place? Obviously not. But, even if a snap of the fingers was all it took to make it happen, it still wouldn’t, and many Longhorns are already on social media making poor attempts at justifying why not.
This has irked me enough to where I wanted to take the liberty of addressing college football’s largest elephant in the room: Sark and his Horns are the biggest posers in the entire sport. They haven’t won jack, yet talk as if they’re your ultimate source for what makes a schedule tough, what you should/shouldn’t weigh in noticing that, and how heavy/light the factoring weights are. In reality, it simply comes off as them punching down on humbler programs to get some heat off of themselves.
But fret not, fellas! This scathing criticism comes from a place of love, which is why I have three basic tasks to help you get the respect you so undeservingly demand—and you only have to accomplish one of them!
Option #1: Schedule Texas Tech (for once)
Again, a Texas-Texas Tech matchup is in no way happening this year, but that doesn’t mean the former can’t schedule the latter for any of the years to come. Heck, you’d probably win; it’s just a matter of whether you have the bravery to risk it (you don’t).
Option #2: Get back over the hump (for once)
Ya know who doesn’t complain much about tough schedules? Teams good enough to endure them and win it all anyway. If you don’t want us laughing off your hollow opinions, breaking your perpetual "has-been" image is about as effective of a fix as you can possibly muster.
Option #3: Shut up (for once)
Me, personally? I love this option, because it comes with the least amount of both risk and adversity, while also being as easy as sitting in a library! As long as your trap is shut, you can’t hurl empty fighting words that’ll bring an abundance of hate your way.
So, Texas…you’ve really got some pie on your face thanks to this nonsense with your rival from Lubbock. But, by setting at least one of these simple goals for yourself, you can begin piecing together a path back to greatness. My only concern surrounds the wonder of why Sark hasn’t done so already.
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