FCS Schools to Break Away from NCAA and Begin Paying Players

FCS schools announced Wednesday they will split from the NCAA and begin paying players, citing the bureaucracy of the organization and the 450-page rule book as reasons.

The FCS beat the Power Five conferences to the punch. On Wednesday, schools in the Football Championship Subdivision announced that they will break away from the NCAA to form their own association and begin paying players. An FCS official said they are tired of the bureaucracy and the unreasonable demands of the 450-page rule book.

The league will be called the National Association of Paid Student Athletes (NAPSA), and Jim Tressel is already the leading candidate to serve as the organization’s first commissioner, but multiple officials who were in the SMU athletic department when the school received the “Death Penalty” in 1987 for massive NCAA violations are also being considered.

NCAA President Mark Emmert said he was disappointed with the decision and that the move will be a danger to the athletes his institution attempts to exploit.

“This is an unprecedented move and unfair to the many athletes that compete at these schools,” Emmert said. “How are we going to provide these valuable student-athletes with a quality education if we can’t continue to make billions of dollars off of them without them making a dime?”

The vote was unanimous among all 124 FCS Athletic Directors and all 13 conference commissioners, and it will apply to all sports.

It is unclear what the pay of athletes will be, but North Dakota State has already arranged for every recruit on a campus visit to receive a $1,000 check, a “hostess,” and a plane ticket to Las Vegas for the next week after their visit.

Unfortunately, the school can’t provide the hotel room once the player is there. That will be a violation of the new NAPSA rules and regulations.

The move is likely to dramatically change college athletics as we know it.

The FCS official who went unnamed expressed his confidence that very soon the NAPSA will have all the dominant schools from this point on, citing the fact that they have the recruiting edge for the best athletes if they can pay them openly.

“Sorry Florida State and Notre Dame, but North Dakota State is about to be the pinnacle of college football,” he said. “Forget Michigan-Ohio State. The rivalry everybody is about to focus on now is going to be the four-way rivalry between North Dakota, North Dakota State, South Dakota, and South Dakota State. This is where everybody will want to go to college now.”

Emmert said the NCAA is considering legal action to fight this, but it is unclear if he has a case. What is clear is that the FCS schools do have to remain a part of the NCAA until the end of June.

A number of prominent boosters for the major FBS schools, particularly in the SEC, have joined with Emmert in speaking out against the decision. One prominent Auburn booster who did not want to be named was incredibly irate.

“How are we supposed to compete if we have to still pay players under the table while these schools can pay players openly?” he said. “This is wrong on so many levels. Paying college athletes legally has no place in college sports. If you are going to pay them, it needs to be in a way that is shady and illegal so nobody finds out.”

An Alabama booster agreed initially, but as soon as they both got on the Paul Finebaum show together to discuss the issue, they began to incoherently cuss each other out about which school is better without making any headway.

Whether or not NAPSA ends up overtaking the NCAA in terms of television deals, attendance, and success of sports teams is up for debate. But what is not up for debate is that this entire article is a hoax.

Happy April Fool’s Day everybody!

Next: 10 Bold Predictions for Spring Football

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